crazy-raver's Diaryland Diary

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Settling in to whats infront of you.

Yo,

I am a wake. Longing for my dreams to take over and me to lose consciousnesses. As I said before, the harsh realities are settling in. I spoke with Alex on the way back from Target.

"So do you think things would be better if you were still with Nilaphay?" He said.

I thought to myself. The alternatives that I see are not the realities that exist. That plain truth made me sad, and with a smile I must push on. One would think about all the things that could and will happen and make them happy, and all that would do is subdue the anguish that one feels when the stockpiled feelings of despair and grief let loose. So I can go on and on about what coulda been. I just wanna sit a little longer and bitch about it. OOOooooH!! How I wanna do that. Get over it Chung. Let you rage subside. Let the gentle breeze settle in. A wind of change.

Whew.

How do you see my persona?

I see myself as callous most of the time. Though there is a time that one as callous as I can be sweet, I rarely see that side of me nowa days.

The poems I write... Very few did Nilaphay understand them. Rather she would feel them. The things that I would write she would not understand at times and I guess thats one things I must get accustomed too. Not everyone will understand the meanings that are intended. I can see that. Heres one for the books and logs. See what you make out of this one.

Knowing with a satisfaction
In a mind set of devotion
My heart cries out in joy
Of happiness I can employ
Tantalizing in another's feat
While basking in those who weep
All but watching emotions grown
Tending to what one has sown

Well? How was it? I hope I didn't split and skulls.

I better be going to bed.

I'll ponder some more later on as the new day comes.

Well, thats all for now.

Laters guys and gals.

Chung

2:23 a.m. - 2008-02-08

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